browbeater, coercer, intimidator

Ever have one of those days where the rug seems to be pulled out from underneath you?  Something is said, something is done, that just knocks you and sends you tumbling?

That happened today.

It wasn't devastating.  But it hurt.  An idea was brought up and my first instinct was to fight it.  This isn't what I want!  This goes against everything we've been talking about!  This isn't fair!!!


But, the truth is, not discussing it wasn't fair.  Fighting it right out of the gate wasn't fair.  Trying to force guilt wasn't fair.  Trying to bully wasn't fair.

That's what I am.

I'm a big ol' bully.  A meanie.

And that needs to change.  And that change begins right here.

We gave two minutes each to argue our points, to defend our positions.  And, although I definitely gave a better argument (facts, opinions, statistics, all that jazz), his won.  And his won because his was about feelings: desires, fears, needs.  In the end, in a good relationship, feelings win over cold hard facts every time.